Welcome to my Blog!

Thank you for joining me on my blogging journey! I look forward to going through my years of Undergrad with you and giving you insight about what it is like being a Pre-Medical student in 2022. I want to inform you that I am currently a Junior attending a Texas University in the DFW area and I am 20 years old. I have gone through a lot of trials and tribulations all throughout my school years but college has been completely different than anything I have ever experienced. I hope you enjoy my story!

If you have any questions about my blog, want me to expand on a topic, or have an idea for a post, contact me directly!

I graduated High School in 2020, the year of the pandemic. Naturally, I was pretty upset about it. I usually spent all my time inside regardless, but no one likes being told they HAVE to do it, so I got angry. I did not really enjoy High School as it was, so I had worries for starting college, especially during the middle of a pandemic! So, I was worried I would not be able to make friends, that I would not stand out, and that I was not going to find my place. However, a month before school started, I decided that I was going to make an impact and re-create myself so I can have a better experience than I did in High School. Therefore, I started a club with a personal interest: Swimming. I swam competitively for 4 years at that point and was sad my University did not have a swim team, so I started one myself! This was the first step I had taken for myself to re-invent who I was and it felt amazing! Then, a week or so later, I interviewed to be in the Student Government Association (SGA) and was placed as the Science Representative, since I was a Pre-Medical Biology major. I was ecstatic! For the first time in a very long time, I felt truly proud of myself and very happy with the progress I had already made.

First Semester:

Once I started my courses for that semester, I realized that introductory college courses were not much harder than AP High School classes. Of course, I had to adjust to an A/B schedule since my High School did not have that same set up for classes but other than that, my first couple weeks were really great!

Before the end of the semester, I had been "promoted" to SGA secretary on the executive board, was the President of the Swim Club, and had made some wonderful friends who were very goal oriented and were also pursuing medical school. I learned many things that semester that I never could have imagined prior to starting college. I was taught the importance of loyalty to your friends, not giving all of your attention to a boy, how NOT to study, and how to communicate effectively with professors, staff, and deans. Unfortunately, I would end up forgetting all of these lessons by the beginning of my second semester through the end of my third.

Second Semester:

This semester was really difficult for me. I pushed all of my friends away and lost sight of my goals. When I started college, I had a bright future established in my head and was a very positive person. However, I realized that the bubbly personality I was putting on display was not my own and that drove people away. I was told I was "fake" and "spoiled," and that really broke my heart. I tried so hard to impress people that I changed who I was, and I still was not liked. But what did I do? I became mean and cold with people I interacted with. I did not allow people to get close to me and I refused to let them get to know me. I kept up with my studies, organizations, family, and decided I was best alone. However, halfway through the semester, I realized I missed being a social butterfly and decided to retry my "fake" personality with a new group of friends. Can you imagine how that went? The exact same way it did before. To no surprise, the cycle continued and I was left very unhappy. On the surface, I appeared to be a very successful student but on the inside I was crying for help and losing myself every single day.

Third Semester:

This was the hardest semester of my academic career and I am still trying to recover. Per usual, the semester started out wonderful. I made 2 wonderful friends, one of which was in SGA with me, and I felt myself turning around and finally able to see the bright future I once saw before. I was taking Microbiology and Organic Chemistry at the same time but I did not mind it. I felt as if the content was easy to understand since I was studying so effectively and had like-minded people along side me. I felt very uplifted and had a brand new vision for myself. As the semester progressed, my extracurriculars grew tremendously, since we were out of the pandemic scare, and I was able to orchestrate large scale campus events. One of these events included the Homecoming Block Party. I put my heart and soul into this event and made sure the ENTIRE school knew about it. I was so proud to host it and see how it turned out. To my surprise, my new friend, the one in SGA, was not doing her job in assisting me at the event. So I asked her to go to her post and do her job since she signed up for it. However, when I went back to check in, she was not there. I started to get frustrated and went to find her. Sadly, she was talking to an old friend of mine from the first semester... The one I pushed away. So I knew immediately that they were talking about me and I felt sick to my stomach. There I was, a changed person, seeing the consequences of my actions right in front of my eyes. I was so embarrassed and sad that I ran to the bathroom to cry and missed 30 minutes of my own event. One of the other SGA members found me in there and comforted me. She reinforced my confidence and told me to "go back out there and give them a reason to talk." That I need to show the best version of myself and not be so worried about what they are thinking of me. So that's what I did. I kept running the Block Party and I kept my composure for the rest of the night. The next morning, that friend texted me and we decided to hang out and do homework. While we were hanging out, I made sure to ask her what she was talking about with my old friend, since the curiosity was getting the best of me. She told me that they were talking about how I'm "too direct" and willing to "knock the competition out of the way." I was absolutely stunned. I knew in that moment that I had a hard time making friends with other pre-medical students because I was seen as competition. I had never considered that thought before she told me that and I realized that they had a reason to be concerned about me. I might not have been the smartest in the classroom or the best, but I am very resourceful and a great speaker. So I asked my friend how she felt about it and she told me she felt the same way. I felt my face get red and my blood pressure rise because I knew she would eventually not be my friend ether. However, we finished our study session anyways and she event invited me to a party later that week. I told her I would go but I ended up changing my mind since I know how college parties go. Instead, I did flag running for the homecoming football game and then went on a movie date with a guy I had met the week before. Long story short, the date went well but my friend was upset with me for not going to her party. I knew in that moment that my suspicions were correct about her because no real friend will pressure you to go to a party and then get upset when you don't go. If she saw me as coopetition, then we would never end up truly being friends. So we stopped talking and I was still sad. I was still alone and feeling down about myself. Even though her and I were no longer friends didn't mean that I did not miss the times we shared. I once again fell into a depression that would make it hard for me to go to school, get out of bed, and even eat. I questioned whether or not I was meant to be a Doctor or even practice medicine. I wanted to quit college and run away from home. For as long as I could remember, my parents knew I wanted to be a doctor. I knew I would be such a disappointment if I changed my life course so I suffered in silence until I could not do it any longer. I finally cracked under the pressure and told my parents I did not want to be a biology major anymore, the typical pre-medical degree. For 2 weeks, my family was very upset with me because of the way I went about telling them. I looked through all of the degree choices my school offered and decided on Exercise Science. Now, I know what you are thinking, really Brooklynn? Exercise Science? Yeah, I know. But hear me out, the classes are so interesting and still include the prerequisite courses I need to apply to medical school! I decided to be a Kinesiology major and study something I am actually interested in.

Fourth Semester:

This was a life changing choice I made that completely altered my college lifestyle. The professors were more understanding, the classroom environment was a happier setting, and my mentality was enlightened. My parents also encouraged me to get a job working in the medical field. So I got online and searched for a couple hours a day when I found an agency called ProScribe. This company trains medical scribes to work at nearby hospitals that are partnered with them. Fortunately for me, I got a job working at an ER that is less than 10 minutes from my house! I was so happy but so nervous! But I was now able to save my own money and start paying for my own schooling. I felt very fulfilled and proud of myself. I started working every weekend, gaining medical experience and creating bonds with the doctors around me. My 4th semester I decided to actually keep to myself and stay within my own lane. I found that I am much happier studying content I actually find interesting! I was doing amazing in my classes, creating more large scale events for the school, and doing amazing at work. I decided to run for Vice President and was elected into office. It was a struggle getting there, but I made it.

One of these days, I will go into detail about my fourth semester but for now, I think I summed it up pretty well. I have had a painful experience starting college but that is okay because everybody has their own troubles dealing with situations and the pressures of the college lifestyle. All I can suggest is finding your own rhythm and getting in sync with that vibration. I know it sounds corny but there is no other way to live. Hard work and talent mean nothing if you are not working towards a goal. So find your goal and take those first few steps towards it. You will change your goals, you will fail, and you will be lost at times, but keep pushing because your future self will be grateful. :)